Is "Clean" a Four-Letter Word?

I'm confused by something. I like to read widely. I like realistic problems, deep-felt struggles, and non-stereotypical characters in my fiction. I want to see how other people think and handle problems. (After all, I already know how I think.)

There are so many books out there no one can read them all, so we all have reading preferences--like reading only certain genre or liking the romantic lead to be tall, dark and handsome. My main "narrow down my choices of what to read" preferences are minimal cussing and no graphic sex.

(To be specific, I prefer no cussing or only a few cuss words per chapter or the "he cussed up a storm" style of handling bad language. If the novel contains sex, I prefer that it's realistic/has realistic consequences and isn't described graphically/titillatingly.) I've read books that don't meet these preferences, and, no, I'm not offended by them. I just don't prefer--for various reasons--to read them.

Since books don't have ratings on sex/gore/violence/bad language, I either have to confine my reading to imprints known for staying within my guidelines and settle for whatever writing quality I get or ask other readers for their recommendations of well-written mainstream fiction that meets my preferences. I like to branch out, so I've been asking for "clean reading" recommendations on Twitter, my blog, and a few other places.

I thought people would enjoy being asked for recommendations. I thought "clean" was the standard short-hand word used to give people an idea of what I meant. But this question seems to upset a few people. In fact, I've been told I should read according to their preferences instead of mine. *baffled look* Thank you, but you have your preferences and I have mine.

I honestly don't understand why people aren't just ignoring me or giving me a genuine recommendation. Why be upset? After all, I obviously respect and am interested in their reading choices or I wouldn't be asking for a recommendation.

So I can only conclude that using "clean" is somehow offending people when I never meant it to. So, if "clean" is a dirty word, what should I use instead?


Update: Amy pointed out that she wrote on this topic yesterday on her blog. I agree with her Read and Let Read post and think it's well worth reading.